needless to say..

it has been a while since i've written, but i thought i'd go for something a little less deep as contemplations on the existence of soul. ;) instead, an update, and something rather personal.

the past few weeks have been me trying to finish up classes, do them well, and get good grades. for the first time in my life, i felt like i had an honest chance at a 4.0 and i didn't get it. i got 5 A's and 1 B. while i should be proud of myself, being so close yet not attaining what i wanted hurts. i just wanted a good 4.0 to help my GPA before transcripts got sent to grad schools. so much for that. i got my B in the stupidest class i had this entire semester; the class i abhorred. i am still angry, but realizing that life goes on. c'est la vie.

otherwise, i have good news. i slaved over a paper for my women's lit class (my teacher does NOT play, she is amazingly intelligent and expects a heck of a lot out of her students, which is refreshing). thankfully, i got a 48/50 on the paper and my professor rather liked it. even more exciting, my professor sent me an email over the break about a conference at george mason university in VA that is based around post colonialism/globalization studies. she suggested a book to me and i am going to read it and incorporate that knowledge into my paper and submit it in hopes of being a presenter at the conference. if i am accepted, i get $250 and a wonderful resume building presentation opportunity. OH and i get to go to virginia. woo. the paper that i wrote was about one of the main characters of the god of small things and how she pursues her own self-consciousness relationally, and how in doing so she breaks societal norms. it's a very feminist paper, with two of the main theoretical secondary texts being "the laugh of the medusa" by helene cixous and "this sex which is not one" by luce irigaray.

also, i don't know if this was blogged -- i wrote an abstract and sent it to the people at the popular culture association and it was accepted. i'll be speaking at a conference in new orleans this april. i'll be speaking on the topic of the chretien de troyes arthurian romances and how the view of faith shifts between those narratives and the narrative expressed in the 2004 film king arthur with clive owen.

on a less intellectual note, friday night i went to auburn to celebrate my friend ethan's 21st birthday, which was a lot of fun. dinner at niffer's, hookah at insomnia, drinks at a sketch bar, what more could we want? ;) in all seriousness, it was a blast. got to meet some new people (lots of really interesting, intellectual, fun-loving, welcoming people) and i'm sure that ethan enjoyed his birthday blast so i was pleased with that outcome.

but wait, there's more! we woke up saturday morning at jill's apartment and decided to go to atlanta with a bunch of people we didn't know. random? yes. spontaneity, ftw. the only thing that was really ftl is that i ended up going to target and buying clothes, because i didn't plan to be not in montgomery for that long, lol. anyway, once there, we ate at taco mac (after a long walk to find it) and then played frisbee at centennial square (maybe that's what it's called?), got starbucks, then headed back.

again, lots of really cool people. for some reason i had a ridiculously short temper/nerve, and in retrospect i feel really bad about that. i hope i can hang out with those people again so that there is an understanding that anything i said that was short tempered was not personal, but very internal.

so that was my weekend. and today? today i've spent time working on graduate essays and am almost officially applied to MTSO. i have to send off transcripts, and i need to send off all the application materials to apply for their harding scholarship (full tuition and a $10,000 stipend) which i desperately want. still, i feel rather accomplished.

and now, a small last note that i would like to share -- why does the phrase "needless to say" exist in the common lexicon? the phrase is ridiculous and i have become accustomed to saying it, but am kicking the habit. if something needs not be said, then why would you say it? UGH. i don't know why it bothers me so much, but it just strikes me as useless. i'd love for someone to tell me a usage of it though, so that maybe 1) it wouldn't drive me crazy, 2) i could have a good reason as to why i say it all the time, lol.

and, that's all. it's a very scattered entry, but it's my thoughts. enjoy. say hey :)